It always seems when I get home there is something he has done unexpectantly. I loved coming home to him. Not just the things he did but just to be with him. Charles was a fantastic person to be with. He loved me and I loved him. And our life together was full of surprises and falls, lots of falls, and love.

I came home one day after work, as usual he was there before me. I came in the house, it was warm I saw candles that were lit, I was scared. Did he burn something? What did he do this time? I always smiled thinking of his unfortunate events out of his kindness. It was two days before Christmas. So he had decorated the house with so much stuff our house resembled a Christmas shop. It was to the point of ridiculus. We use to put out Christmas lights but one year he was electrocuted, not badly but he did do a few sumersults when the sparks came out of the socket. The wall saved him from the bitter cold outside if he had penetrated the housing. Smoke came out of his mouth. This could be serious. "Are you hurt?" I asked trying not to laugh. "This is your fault", he said accusingly. "I didn't think your body could twist such a way that was the most elegant move you've ever made." I was relieved. "I could have fried." he was truly aggitated. All I could think about was that it was in slow motion, he looked like a swan, and it was beautiful. If only I could be so elegant. He recovered, but outside lights were out for the duration of our Christmas's together. Such a kind man could be so stubborn of a little incident, I always reminded him, as he would me of how close he came to being fried.

But what stands out is the ornaments we swapped every year. Never opened. Saved until our fiftieth anniversary. Then the old went out and the new went on the tree. A hundred new ornaments to share on a live tree.

I gave him postal ornaments he gave me character ornaments. Mostly Christmas wizards. Usually he would save all the presents until Christmas morning. He would wake up on Christmas eve when I was asleep and put out all the presents from Santa he would say. I would say the next morning Santa left his presents in the closet and if he wanted them badly enough he would have to help me get them out.
Naturally he was the first to open the door. He was like a kid. The charm and carisma and stealth he always passed off to people went away on Christmas.

Though today wasn't Christmas. But there was a beautiful wrapped gift on the coffeetable. I looked at him, he looked serious. He wasn't smiling. He was dressed really nice. Like always. The heat came on in the house, his hair moved like the wind was blowing slightly. Mine just lay flat. Why does he look good all the time? Why is he with me? What do I have to offer except a few tumbles and minor accidents? When we were dating he said he was falling for me, but I don't think he thought it was going to be physical at the time.
Most of the time.

"What is it?" I asked in excitement, "This is so beautifully wrapped, did you do this?" Of course he did. I didn't want to open it. It was so lovely just looking at it. It could have been a window display. "What scissors did you use?" I was joking. "Your good ones, only for the best." Uh Oh. " It looks so nice" I couldn't hide the smile. I sat on the floor in front of the present, he sat across from me on his sofa. The sofa is another story all by itself. His hands were folded like a priest, holding the pinky fingers.

"I want you to open this now," he was really serious, "I want you to enjoy it every day." Now I was scared. Nothing came out from behind his back, nothing, not even a notecard. "Should I search the house?" I whispered. "Open your present early, later there will be more." "What about you, I don't have anything for you to open, it doesn't seem fair." I'm also thinking in my mind as to how I was going to top his wrapping. "Open it!" This was really serious. But before I opened it he gave me a fresh cappicino and some baklava. He had red wine.

Well I opened it carefully doing my best not to tear the paper and bows and bells and ornaments and ribbons. I made a big production of this. He was impatient. Something was diffently wrong. Finally I saw a beautiful box decorated with the finest paintings of Christmas scenes. "Wow, how beautiful again. You put a lot into this, I don't know what to say, I'm speechless." Tears were pouring out of my eyes. I just wanted to sit with him, he insisted I keep going. There, in the box, was the DKNY dress I was looking at for a long time and the boots to go with them. He had gone to the mall an hour and a half away to get this for me. He did this after a hard day at work, when the weather was below 20 degrees and the snow had not yet melted. And he looked like he just stepped out of a limo.

I cried. He pulled me up to him and whispered in my ear, "Wear this every day of your life you don't know what I had to go through to get this." Now I know why he was so serious.

He had found the dress in the mall at my favorite store in the children's section. I'm small I wore a ten in children's clothing. So the sales people assumed he was shopping for his daughter. Not so. That was the first embarrassment. The second one came when he purchased the suede laced up boots that go to the knee with the four inch heels. The dress was a long grey thermal dress that was the length to my ankles. Charles was fabulous in dressing me in the current trends. I trusted his judgement and he was fabulous. Of course, he always was tailored. But never proud. He just liked to look nice. And I always loved to be with him with or with out his tailored clothing. His magic closet, I called it. I just loved him, and him alone.
The third embarassment came when he walked out of the store onto the curb. He was wearing his long black duster with the pair of shoes I bought him last year for Christmas. These shoes were black and red and had metal hiker loops. Somehow when he stepped from the curb, the hooks seemingly became interlocked, he bcame airbound, did a full flip, legs in the air, down on the ground, the packages were scattered, he had stopped traffic, it was so serious people got out of there cars to see if he was ok. Strangers were collecting his belongings. Taking them to him by his side, one pedistrian was holding his hand, traffic had backed up in the mall parking lot. Security was called to the scene. Charles, as he recollected just laid there a few moments. The crowd was getting thick. Someone was holding hand and head now. "I'm ok." "I'm ok." Someone helped him up. He was shaken. People gave him his packages and glasses. Someone had the nerve to tell him to tie his shoes. He shook hands with everyone and security for there kindness and apologized for any inconvenience he may have caused. Then he walked away. He said he looked back gave a big smile and waved good-bye.

"Why is it when I do some good for you, I get hurt in the process?" he accused me. I shrugged, feeling sorry for him in his unexpected event and laughing at the imagination of the sight. "I will never go to that store again." he was stern. "Are you serious., who is going to remember you this time of year?" I was laughing so hard. "I like my presents and I can't wait to go out dressed up, but I love you most." We kissed. And more.

A year went by and I wanted to get something special for my sister. She is as small as I am. So I pleaded with Charles to go to the store where his catastrophe happened. He was reluctant. He thought someone would recognize him. I bargained that I would buy him more candles. Scented candles! And that I would take the responsiblity if the house burnt down. He agreed without hesitation. It was Christmas time again. He was dressed with a red button down shirt, green tie with snowman and black jacket and pants. Everything perfectly creased. And the duster. But this time he was wearing another new pair of shiney shoes. The tie was new now that I think of it. I was wearing my DKNY outfit from last year.

We were in the store where he had purchased the outfit I was wearing. And as I was shuffling through the clothing someone came up to Charles and introduced himself and asked how he was doing. Charles held his hand firm and peirced his soul with his eyes and asked after seconds who he was. "I was the one standing outside the store last year when you went airborne and you stopped traffic halfway around the mall. I was taking a break at the time, I ran and gathered your stuff, and I handed them to you. Don't you remember? You are all right, right?" The guy was shaking. Charles seeing the young man, also Charles being embarrassed being recognized after a year, said to the young man, " I'm glad you were around at the time and I thank you for your help. There was a moment I didn't think I was going to make it." My name is Charles and this, over there, Maureen, is my wife, to whom I was shopping for at the time." So the guy said it was yout wife's fault. Charles laughed. We all became friends. We met his wife and child. We had a few dinners and lunches together after the meeting. We are friends with this person and his family. Charles was that type. He could make what could stop a man in his tracks seem seemingless to what could be accomplished in a handshake.

I still buy Charles ornaments even though he he not here physically. I miss him. I can't seem to put the dress and boots on even though I still have them. I will always wait to be with him. Now is not soon enough. How do people go from life to death to living again? I can't find the reason. I just want to be with Charles. I don't understand God leaving me here knowing how much I loved him.

Our favorite book we read together was The Tales of the Arabian Nights. So the word espied stayed with us so it stayed in our vocabulary. The season was Fall I could almost bet that he was on the hammock.

I recieved a promotion from work, I was so excited I couldn't wait to tell him. I drove into the driveway, parked the car, and got out. There he was just like I thought. He had the dog and cat laying with him. Unusual becuase he didn't like the cat too much because it sucks on fingers and ears. I ran and jumped on all three of them. We twisted over. I hit the ground solid. The dog ran away, the cat was dazed. Charles started at a tumble in what seemed like slow motion and then started sumersaulting, his arms flapping out like birdie wings trying to fly. It looked like ballet to me. I couldn't take my eyes from what I was seeing. When he impacted the tree he stopped.

I crawled over to him, he was motionless. He was on his back spread out, "Charles," I tried not to laugh, " Did you see what you acconplished?" "No, and right at this moment, I think I should be mad at you, " he said groaning. "I got a promotion." I said happily. "Can we talk about me for a moment, like what just happened, I could have been killed," his voice was garbled now. The cat came over sat by his head and started sucking on his ear lobe. The dog sat at his side and I climbed on top of him. We all loved this man. "Are you hurt, broken?" " My earlobe," he replied, "Get "your" cat away."

We all got up, he was ok. Why does his hair look like it hadn't been in an accident? I was so jealous. "Look you three broke my afternoon bed." he said with his hands in his pockets, his back straight and his shoulders squared looking down on all of us. Us looking back at him. "You can fix it again, remember the time we were.. and it broke.. and you..." He tapped me on top of the head. So I shut up.

He took my hand and we went into the house, sat on the sofa and we talked about my job that I was going to quit. He said I didn't have to go back, but if I felt like I had to do something he was for it. But the best part of this was he had a woodenbox on the coffetable with our names engraved on it. "What's this? I asked. I leaned over to look closer, "Did you write this? It looks like your handwriting. How did you do this? Did you use my dremel? "It was easy," he said with pride and smiling ear to ear. "Can I open it?" I asked with caution. I know he is not an artistic type. Who did he hire? "Open it, please, it is for us." He was excited, like it was his present. I opened the box, there lay in a purple velvet lined box, two pair of night goggles and two pair of long range hearing devices. My mouth fell open, I was speechless, words wouldn't come out, it was something I always wanted. I guess he did also. I hugged and kissed him. "Can you wait until dark?" he asked. I told him that I couldn't wait.

We were both impatient, but finally night came. We geared up. We looked silly. He was dressed in black khakis and black T-shirt and new blackshoes, not shiney this time. Was this another new outfit that just came out of his closet? I was never shocked when something new came out of his closet, I got used to it. He wanted to be unseen. I had a black jogging suit and blacksocks. He thought life was a costume party and he played the part for every occasion. His motto to me was "Life is full of events, dress for it."

When we finally came home and ungeared, we talked for a long time on everything from his work to my work to what we saw and heard. We didn't even watch TV. We were both getting tired, but he was going to stay up for awhile. I walked to the bedroom and just happen to notice the garbage needed to be taken out. It was already tied. I took it out of the bin, and in the bottom of the bin was a dremel bit. I untied the trash, there were a lot of dremelbits. All different sizes, fractured. I reached in to pick up the massacre, I also felt a blade of some kind. It was one half of my favorite pair of scissors, the ones I kept in a drawer so he wouldn't try chopping food or metal and for another fact wood. I didn't try to find the other half, I just took everything outside. I couldn't help but smile from his efforts.

I crawled into bed, something was under my pillow. A notecard. I turned the light on and opened it. It read: New dremel replacements in dremel box and a new pair of scissors you like are in the drawer I am not suppose to find. I love you and I know we were meant to be together.

I went to the sofa where he was, he was asleep, with the dog and cat on top of him. I crawled up there too. That's where we all slept that night.

I can't seem to get myself to finish our book. I still have it though. I walk the pets but it's not an adventure. I miss him. I miss my husband.

When Charles and I had to wash our clothes we had to go out to do them. It was a big task it just took time away from doing better things. Time we could be riding in our jeep or going to the movies, etc. Other things besides public laundry. It was Friday, we did this on that night so we would have Sat. and Sun. to do anything we wanted. I asked him if he wanted to go this time. "No, I'll stay here and listen for the phone in case you have been in an accident or have an emergency." Nice of him to be so concerned. "I have a present for you." I said. He looked at me beaming. I walked over to him, put my hand behind my back, like he does his, and pulled out his present and dropped it. He caught it before it hit the ground. Why couldn't things suddenly appear out of nowhere like he makes objects?
"It feels like a book, can I open it?" he asked. "Will you go with me tonight, doesn't matter what the title is?" I said with hope in my voice. He looked at his book , then at me. Then at the book and said, "Let us draw straws." "No! I was cheated last time and the time before, should I go on and count the ways." He held his head down not in shame or embarrassment but looking at his present. He finally opened it. Delighted he said it was just what he wanted: Space Odyssey: 2010. He changed clothes into new khakis, and black T-shirts, blacksocks, and tan shoes. Everything was new. He was always coming out something shiny and new. "People are going to think we can't afford to buy a washeranddryer because you are wearing new clothes," I said. He replied like a professor explaining, "No, they are going to think we ran out of clothes and had to go out an get something to wear instead of dirty clothes. I'm thinking, should I stay home with the usedclothes that I was wearing? He loaded the car, took his book with him then a few minutes we were there. So many people. He's armed with dirty clothes and I'm armed with clean fresh smelling detergent. Where was his book? I looked behind his black casual jacket. Surely it wasn't there, somewhere. He helped me load the washers, soap, and coins. Everything was started. We sat down, he asked if I wanted something to drink or a snack since I didn't eat anything. How sweet. We shared a soda and battled over the candybars that we ended up sharing. Kids were everywhere, their parents weren't paying attention. Single girls and boys. Men and women. Charles started reading his book. He saw me get up with the fabric softener and helped me with the machines. People were watching him and whispering. But they were smiling. Some of the women were smacking their significant other half on the arms and backs. Charles managed to get a few dirty looks and he would just take my hand and nod and smile at them. I walked closer to him smiling at the women. We sat down, talked, each giving turns talking about our day at work. People were looking at me because when Charles told me his adventures on his postal route, it was always funny, I was laughing so hard that the children crying couldn't be heard. After our talking and laughing ceased, he went back to his book. This time when I went to change the clothes to the dryer he didn't notice. I had the Bounce sheets with me. Standing by the dryers going with our clothes in them, this muscular man in his late 30's approached me and gave me his name, Leroy, and his phone number and asked if I would like to have dinner and a movie with him out of town. I said to him, "That is my husband over there." "The old guy or the yuppie with his nose in the book." he asked. What Leroy didn't know was the my "Yuppie" had many trainers from boxing, wrestling, and so many different martial arts you could imagine. Charles never counted black belts or medals. He wasn't fond of bragging and didn't like to here how high people competed and won. His friends told me "Charles's rule was five or less. If it took more than five chances to put someone out or cry mercy then everything beyond that was show and tell. Many people tried to challenge him in front of their friends. Charles didn't have patience when it came to fighting. At the end, he would always help the person up ask if he was ok and if they could spar together friend to friend and if the wounded and the battered person would like to join him for a drink along with his friends. I saw him fight a few times, he played music in a bar, sometimes fights happen. It was usually over some drunk guy being verbally or physically mean to a girl, but when I did see him fight, it always looked choreographed with flowing movements. The most I had seen him reach was four to finish the poor soul down and out. The wounded soul was a biker. Later, us and the bikers all had drinks and a lot in common from dogs to traveling. They stayed in touch for a long time. Like most of the people we met. Word spreads in the music circuit. He had some strangers come to him offering him money to do some damage to someone. Charles would say I have this uncle Ralph, people call him Ralphie, he was just one of my trainers, here's his number, give him a call, he owes me a favor. That was that. What the people found out when they called and asked for Ralph, Ralph would say people don't call me Ralph. They would respond and say Ralphie. His uncle would set up a meeting. Ralph and Ralphie wasn't his real name and he was an undercover police officer. He new Charles had sent him a live one. A bad seed.
Back to Leroy, "Charles," I yelled over the screaming and yelling that came from the parents and children, "Please come quickly." He was up and over in record time. He looked stared at Leroy's eyes, extended his right hand and asked charmingly, "Who our new acquaintance." I gave Charles Leroy's number. "This is Leroy, he is interested in the Space Odyssey's also." I looked at Leroy then at Charles. Charles bore into the guy's soul then reached and grab his hand and shook it with both of his. Charles would not let go. "It's a pleasure, and we have two things in common. Do you have a significant other? Do you come here often, alone?" Leroy's mouth fell open, word's wouldn't come out. Charles released his hands after a short time. Leroy was looking at his red hand and white knuckles. He finally looked and saw Charles put his number in his wallet. "We will be calling you to get together to watch one of the movies or just discuss the book or maybe even a sequel." He said it in such a serious tone. Leroy wanted to say something, Charles stayed by my side and did not move until Leroy went away. People stopped watching. Both of us walked away together. Me holding my husband's hand. I told Charles what the guy really said to me. "The guy did look like as if he worked out a lot, do you ever think I should get that muscular?" Looking at me with a glint he took care of something not right. He went back to his book. He was so engrossed with it by now I was able to fold and load the car without him. I was standing over him, "Are you ready to go.? He looked up in shock. "Is it time to change the clothes?" he asked. He looked around, shut his book, took my hand, helped me into the car, and we left. "All those people watched you fold and load, how embarrassing, they must think your married to a jerk. Why did you not get me." I was laughing. It's very seldom do I make him feel like he didn't have a lead. "Never Again." plain statement he said. I never asked if he called Leroy, I didn't want to know the details.
I came home after work, went inside, saw Charles just wearing blackjogging pants, he was upside down on his head and hands a few feet from the wall. This wasn't unusual. He did all kinds of meditations and workouts. "Let me join you," I said excitingly. "No," he said in fear. Then stretched out his arms. All his weight was pouring down to his neck and head. He now was doing an upside down split. I went to the wall and was trying to get up, he put his hands down, spun around, with one hand pushing on my stomach and one leg pushing on my feet, I was upside down. We were facing each other. How romantic. "I can spread my legs too." gleefully smiling. His eyes widened with the inevitable. I fell down into his middle. We were tangled. I struggled free. I was fine. He was in a fetal position. Trying not to scream, tears coming out from the corner of his eyes. "I hurt you, I'm sorry." My knee hurt. How hard did I land on him? Him nodding yes very fast over and over. I was able to get him on the sofa. I went to the kitchen, gathered a towel, ice and a glass of cold water. I set everything in front of him. What does he do? He sits up, puts the towel around his neck, puts the ice in the water and begins to drink.
The next day I come home he upside down again this time socks were added to protect the toe I apparently broken from yesterday. If he hadn't been so close to the coffeetable. . .This time he said I could join him. I said his pants looked funny, I bent over to look upside down, right side up. "Is that a cup you are wearing?" "Yes it is," he said delightfully. I joined him. "Your front looks really weird now." trying to find out the real story. " I got the biggest cup the sports store had," without shame or embarrassment he added. Before I could speak, he said "I know you, I've seen the wraith you can do when you tumble, you have flattened rock to earth level, I do not want my manhood embedded in my colon, it could be a long time until medical science can restore the damage you inflict upon me. We both laughed got down to normal level, our clothes came off. After that, we both didn't want to go out to do the clothes but it had to be done. He went to the shower in the guest bathroom, I went to the bedroom bathroom. The clothes were already separated. How nice. I heard him singing Into the Night. It sounded as if MichealCrawford was in the next room. I started humming Crazy For You. A far cry from Madonna. I ran into the bathroom he was in and started singing If Your happy Clap Your Hands. If Your... He picked me up and I was in the hotwater with him. We were swapping songs. Then the cold water sprayed us, we both were pushing and shoving each other to get out. When we were out, the Shower liner and curtain lay victimized on the floor. We were shivering. We got dressed in the bedroom. I was just about to gather the clothes up and he pulled me on his lap and sat on the bed. "Do not touch them," he said, "they are clean." He reached over and picked up one of his tighty whitey's and held them up to my face and said, "Smell." This was beyond reason. I stretched to reach in the colors for my lawn shirt that read: I'm with Stupid. He had to have one custom made that read: She Paid Me. I don't know what I hated more, the humor or the sheer insults. I looked at my shirt, it was so very small. I was turning it around and around, I don't remember it looking tie dye. He snatched it out of my hand. I twisted out of his arms and fell to the floor, he was next to me in less than a second. Both of us on our hands and knees. "Where are the sheets"? I asked. "On the bed." he said. I looked at the denim. All of them looked as though white out had been sprinkled all over the place. I turned to the bedspread, pulled it off and our yellow sheets looked like a bad Monet painting. I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. I looked at him in shock. He held my shoulders and whispered in my ear, "If you look at the whites," which I did and they were spotted with what looked to be our dark clothes, "They were the last load and he noticed the whites to be brighter than the previous loads because they were last and I think they look a brighter whiter." He was looking at me and smiling ear to ear. His eyes sparkling. Why? I couldn't be mad, he had taken the time to go out and do this by himself, probably because I called him earlier and cried about the bad day I had at work. What a wonderful man I had married. He ruined our wardrobe out of love. I hugged him. Forgetting about digging any deeper knowing that my favorite shirts were now to small and colorized. We both helped each other to our feet, we went to the living room and sat down on the sofa. He said we would go shopping instead to the mountains like we had planned. His excuse was that we both needed new hikingshoes and why not check out the clothing sales. He could use some new suits and I should get somethings for myself. How kind. Some may think he did this on purpose, but I know him. It was an accidental sabotage on our clothing. He took care of washing the outside siding and I took care of the inside clothing. Sometimes I would help him with the siding, but bodily accidents usually happens when we are both together.
We planned our trip, cut coupons, gathered sales ads. It was fun. We called to have Mexican food delivered to our house. We both loved spicy food and challenged each other who would give first on the hottest. He always won. Even when the tears came, the sneezes, the ears burning, the coughing. He would not give. I lost with all the symptoms in pain. We watched back to back episodes of Who's Line Is It Anyways. After we cleaned everything up, he said he bought bigger yogamats and weights for both of us that he had put in the utility room. I couldn't just ignore that comment or the new workout apparatus. I went to get the goods. I opened the door and to my left was a new washeranddryer. I didn't hear him but he was standing behind me. " I did the laundry, will you teach me?" he asked with sincerity. He was hugging me from behind my back while this was taking place. I held his arms and said, "forever." Now today the laundry is light, the showers are solo and there are not any more sing-a-longs. Every morning I ask God, "How long do I have to wait?"

Cooking wasn't my thing. Fear of catching my hair on fire the third time wasn't my idea of trial and error. So the only time I used the stove was to remove the dust. He used the GFGrill. For everything. And what he couldn't do there he used the microwave. To this day I don't understand his compulsion for having so many kitchenappliances. We had a hoteye, a sandwichmaker, four blenders, five different icecrushers, potatomaker, hotdog grill, name it, we had them all.
I opened the pantry while he was stir frying some vegetables on the grill. "Why don't you use this wok we had for a year that is still in its box?" I did ask rather smugly. He asked why would he do that when he already had the food nicely cooking here? "Why did you buy this?" I asked. He said it matched the blender that he would make his homemade soy sauce. The blender by the way hasn't been opened either. It was a year and a half old. "Charles, this is out of control. The pantry is so full of appliances we had to get another pantry for groceries. Some of them are over five years old if not older. Why we even had a recall on the juicemaker three years after the purchase and was able to return it unopened." In fact the only appliances tried were three icemakers and the hotdog warmer. I tried not to squeal. "He raise his voice two octaves higher and shouted, "I can raise my voice higher, too." I held my hands together trying not to point. He came over to me, took my hands with one of his hands in the oversized ovenmitt from which had been badly burnt over the years. Candles. And the other hand holding a wooden spoon. Was he wearing a chefs hat? No. But the white smock with his name on it that he had donned was enough for the setting. Black pants. He was cute. "When we get a bigger home," his eyes widening, "All these will be out for you to use." What did he just say to me? " My use," I took my hands back and turned around trying not to laugh. He went on this time and said, "Most of these were gifts." He was right. Only because he asked for them on his wish list I would occasionally find slipped into a pocket of my clothing or between a sofacushion. I waited for what seemed like eternity. He stepped around to the front of me. He closed the pantry. "Ok," with his hands behind his back, "I ask or purchase another appliance until after we move." I couldn't imagine another appliance that we didn't already have in stock. Uh-oh: upgrade, better and powerful. Like icemakers. I looked at him in horror. This man was mad. Concern was on his face, "What's wrong, you look pale?" "I'm fine, you frightened me there for a moment. I can't imagine you not trying something new on the market." He totally ignored my remark. He said, " I may not be the brightest man alive," people called him Postman Einstein, "but I know," lecturing me, "When we have a bigger kitchen, the pantry is also going to be twice as large as the two we have and combining them we would have three, two small ones and one large one." I was losing him. He came back to the real world and started laughing. I started feeling nausea. I walked away. We had dinner and watched the Blue Comedy Tour and then went to sleep.
That next afternoon when I came in the house from work, he was very silent. I asked him if something dreadful had happened to him at work. Was there an accident, someone was ill. I went on. He moved one hand up and motioned me to come sit by him on our sofa. When I reached him he quickly moved me and sat me in front of him. I was on the hard coffeetable and he was on the big fluffy sofa. Something wasn't fair. He tilted his head to the side still holding my hands, I was going to say something and he put his finger to his lips. I opened my mouth and quickly his hand was under my chin closing my mouth. He tilted his head the other way, his eyes searching my face and then still into my eyes, very calmly said, " I got a call from the the Priest today. He wanted to thank both of us for donating three appliances to the needy. He was going to thank you personally, but he said you left in such a hurry he didn't have time to meet you at the donation door." He breathed. I held my breathe. "Charles, I'm sorry. So very sorry. I will replace them. If you insist. Are you angry?" He moved closer to me, I could feel his warm body, he smelled so nice. He held me in his arms then pulled me away some and moved his arm in front of me and I was looking not at his face now but were flowers he held up. I had to focus. The flowers were beautifully arranged with a wide variety . I moved them down to kiss him, we both touched foreheads, his other hand on the back of my head. We started laughing. I couldn't stop because safety pinned to three different flowers were receipts from the what "we" donated. There are some still left in the pantry which is now locked up. I can't seem to let go of anything he physically touched. I have everything of of his and mine. Just knowing he held something of ours and the thought of letting it go. To me it's unbearable. I've seen people start over, but what makes them do it?

Charles was graceful in his movements. He had a smooth stride when he walked. If I wasn't watching him move around the house, I would never know which room he entered. We were totally opposites. He was tall I was small. He moved quietly, while I sounded if I weighed the size of an elephant. He put things together by picture, I read instructions. He trusted everyone, I was skeptical. He liked loud TV and music, I preferred lip reading the television. He liked bass I liked treble. Everything imaginable two people could be so opposite. The list is long.
One day he said he wanted a hammock, Ok. I want a swing. He looked at me with his eyes boring into my soul, I had to look away from smiling and being embarrassed from I don't know, he could do that to anybody. I knew him though, other people felt uncomfortable when they first met him, until he would speak and tell them he was so very happy to make their acquaintance. The relief and relaxation from handshakes. I could see the agonization immediately go away from people he first met.
We saved our money. We offloaded the box which the hammock was in and set it under the large mapletree in our yard and the box with the swing we sat on the opposite side of the house. Of course. Now it was the battle of the straws to see who got to put which present together first. I said mine. He asked why should I get to go first since he was older. We were both on our knees in front of "his" box.
I told him "If he loved me...." I knew it was going to come to this. We started out in the morning, came home mid-day, and it was hot outside. So if he put his hammock up first it was over for the day. "If you love me..." Trying my best not to whine. So I told him, "I feel you might go away on your hammock and leave me alone and my box unopened." He reached behind his back suddenly and very quick like, he produced two straws. He had moved them so close to my face I was cross eyed trying to focus. Charming. I don't think he heard a word I said. I drew the short straw. He said here let me help you up and we will be on our way to prepare the box. I lost my balance. I rolled down the hill. "Uhgg," He said. I lay motionless next to the tree. He was at my side immediately. He rolled me over gently and in his caressing voice asked, "If I was Ok? Am I broken anywhere?." I looked up at him said no asked him why he didn't catch me from the perils of tumbling down the hill. It was a forever roll. I thought I would never stop. I went on. He put his finger on my mouth as gentle as a butterfly landing. I melted again and embarrassed from his compassion. He let go of me and like taking flight he was standing over me with his hands in his pockets and he smiled so big and with a gentle laugh, "Your perilous journey as you so called it was a 6 foot roll. The tree stopped you from "Tumbling" down into the dangerous road below." Him signing quotations marks around the word perilous, and then quickly back into his pockets. The road was maybe 300 feet away and our mountain maybe a 15 degree slope. Minor hill, major workout. He went on again, "I'm slow to move, how do you expect me to catch you when you are rolling at the speed of light?" He strode away. I looked away. Turned to say he was full of. . . and he was gone. I got up not hurt went to the shed to get my tools. I say that because he played mechanic and I played builder. He was really good with cars. So good he knew when a REAL mechanic should work on the cars. He was in charge of the car maintenance though. I was the handy girl with house maintenance. And I was so good I knew when to call in the PROFESSIONALS. I turned around and he was half way to his box already. I didn't hear him come out of the house. I was running to catch him. He stopped and looked at the tree turned around to where I was and waved hi. And that's what he said Hi. Not am I Ok or let's open your box first. But there he was changed into carpenter's shorts black tee shirt, blacksneakers head visor, sunglasses and to make the complete look he was wearing my toolbelt, hammer in stock. His hair flowing on this hot day. Wow. I started laughing because it wasn't his handsome look, it was the tray with the pitcher of lemonade and glasses he was carrying like it was an everyday thing. I came over to him he set the tray down and picked me up and hugged me and kissed me and twirled me around. I was laughing so hard. He put me down said, "Let's start." Just like that. I went to open his box. I held out my hand and said, "Scalpel." He produced a steak knife. So now with everything out of his box ready to be assembled. I have the instructions in hand he looks at one picture and immediately sets off to operate. I'm glad this man isn't a doctor. "Gray's Anatomy" would become "Grave's Gravity." I'm reading out loud to him. Instructions were all the same to me. Push this, pull that, screw this, and hold that. Up until I met him. He started laughing and turning red in the face. He said all assembly instructions should have a M rating and do not open to minors. I finally took over the toolbelt this was getting nowhere quickly and we were going to lose light. His mind was in the gutter and mine was on my box. Finally, we set his hammock up under the shade tree I fell into. We do live on a slope so the stand had to be stabilized by flat rock. We leveled it. He was so happy with pride. Just like he accomplished a gold metal. I did most of the work. He said asked if I wanted to join him on his first hammock time as he called it. Then he did a side to side dance for a minute. What he thought looked cool and poppy, was pure elegance. If he was only on iceskates. He could have been a dancer if he chose. When we were dating he said he would take me ballroom dancing. "Let's hammcock," he yelled, what sounded like song to me. He got on effortlessly. Wow again. How did he do that with out falling over the other side? He reached out his arms and told me to gently climb on him so we don't twist over. I did. It was a rocky ride for a moment. Then we were still. He kissed my hand and said, "I'm in love with you and I'm a very happy man." We just laid there in the afternoon. The sun was going down. He helped me to the ground. He stayed in his hammock. I took in the tools and the remains of the lemonade. We threw the trash away before the leap of fate. I looked out the window he looked content. I felt content. He had a slight smile on his face. He was asleep. I left him to his time. I went to the bathroom to take a shower and on the counter were two straws the same length. I never checked his straw. He cheated. He knew it was going to get late. I looked up and there was a card taped to the mirror. I opened it and inside it read: Don't be mad. Look into the next room. So I opened the door to the next room and there he had set up a videocamera taping everything we did from the time we were offloading the boxes to the time he was sleeping. My life with him was always full of surprises. We were a pair that had the love that came directly from heaven through to our hearts.